Life is this…

It is already April of 2017 – another year has gone by. And I know that because…because, it is time to file taxes again. And Spring is here again, the rains, of course much needed, will not be missed as much. At least not as much as the cold. So here we were looking forward to the festivities of holi and the welcoming of the warm weather and days full of sunshine. And then out of the blue a mysterious request from a very dear friend. She wrote to Kalpa and me to call her when we were both together. That she wanted to tell us something important and she needed to tell us when we were both together. This is a close friend of many years, someone with whom we have many fond memories – of sites visited together, of fights that never lasted long enough to be remembered, of meals we enjoyed more because of the company then the expertise of the cook, of…the list goes on. Getting a note of this nature was not amongst the ordinary. So, needless to say, events lined up well enough for us to call her together shortly after we got the message. Thinking back to the event now, I can’t remember if we were apprehensive or pensive when calling her. A few idle hi’s and hello’s later she broke the news to us. She has been diagnosed with breast cancer – first stage and she will be going into surgery next month.

• Life is this….

Yup – we were stunned into silence. We did not know how to react – should we be shocked, should we be sad, should we be brave and be strong or be weak and let our emotions take over. It gave us a sinking feeling as she shared the details of events that had led up to the discovery and the turn of events after the discovery. We could feel the pain in her voice, her frustration at the slow progression through the processes and the sad acceptance of the inevitable decision that surgery was imminent. The ripple effect of something of this nature on immediate family for both the spouse and the children, for both siblings and parents, and friends could rattle the strongest amongst us. And you could feel the pangs of this in the deepest section of your stomach – you could feel the void deep down.

• Life is this…

The initial shock of the news was light compared to the unfurling of the events that followed. And then as quickly as we were shaken up, we settled down into next steps to do. All those pink ribbon drives flashed in front of my eyes. And then it sunk in. All those events and runs and donations to breast cancer research, that we come across almost on a daily basis now had a deeper meaning for us. It all seemed together. The following weekend I could feel the impact of these on my subconsciousness as I was having discussion with Miloni and Anjali. Simple questions became philosophical debates.  Spending on project to send man to the Mars suddenly was not as wanting anymore.

• Life is this…

The importance of compassion became even clearer that day. The ability to diagnose early, the need for ourselves to be aware of our physique became clearer, the value of planning a healthy balance in life (work and home) while we are able (bodied) to, became part of the main strategy to go through life.

• Life is this…

How does  one react? What does one do to help? Are you the shoulder to cry on, or the resolute one that can still crack a joke or two and make new memories memorable. So why did I write this? to be completely honest, I don’t really know. I guess one reason was to put this out there – when an event like this happens too close to home, it can transform us – how does one cope with it. We don’t. We let life deal with it. We face it. We come to terms with it and in that moment we decide how to deal with it. We pity our helplessness at first and then we revel in the power of simply being there for our dear ones. A few words of solace, a heartfelt motivation to help and the underlying wish that things will turn out for the best – these are all super powerful.

• Life is this…

So as life unfolds, don’t lose compassion. Find the cause that touches your heart.  Do what you can and not what you must. All that we do, touches someone’s life – make that touch a positive one. Be there for someone in their moment of need. A phone call, a word of praise, a little push to do the next best thing, a gentle caress when life deals a bad hand – these simplest of things are what make life, LIFE.

Stay blessed.