Last summer, the President and Mrs. Clinton were vacationing in their home state of Arkansas.
On a venture one day, they stopped at a service station to fill up the car with gas. It seemed that the owner of the station was once Hillary’s high school love. Bill was quite amused at this, but didn’t mention anything at the time.
They exchanged hellos and went on their way.
As they were driving on to their destination, Bill put his arm around Hillary and said, “Well, honey, if you had stayed with him, you would be the wife of a service station owner today.”
She replied, “No, if I had stayed with him, he would be President of the United States.”
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Hillary Clinton went to her doctor because she was not feeling well.
The doctor explained that she was pregnant again.
She was furious. This would ruin her plans for a Senate run in New York next year. Her dreams were ruined. The more she thought about it, the madder she got. She was so made that she called Bill and the oval office and began to yell and scream at him, how he had selfishly gotten her pregnant, ruined her dreams of running for Senate. She went on and on, finally there was a long pause as she waited for a reply from Mr.Clinton.
After the long silence, Bill said, “…Who is this?”
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Bush, Einstein and Picasso at the Pearly Gates
Einstein dies and goes to heaven. At the Pearly Gates, Saint Peter tells him, “You look like Einstein, but you have NO idea the lengths that some people will go to sneak into Heaven. Can you prove who you really are?”
Einstein ponders for a few seconds and asks, “Could I have a blackboard and some chalk?”
Saint Peter snaps his fingers and a blackboard and chalk instantly appear. Einstein proceeds to describe with arcane mathematics and symbols his theory of relativity.
Saint Peter is suitably impressed. “You really ARE Einstein!” he says.
“Welcome to heaven!”
The next to arrive is Picasso. Once again, Saint Peter asks for credentials.
Picasso asks, “Mind if I use that blackboard and chalk?”
Saint Peter says, “Go ahead.”
Picasso erases Einstein’s equations and sketches a truly stunning mural with just a few strokes of chalk.
Saint Peter claps. “Surely you are the great artist you claim to be!” he says. “Come on in!”
Then Saint Peter looks up and sees George W. Bush. Saint Peter scratches his head and says, “Einstein and Picasso both managed to prove their identity. How can you prove yours?”
George W. looks bewildered and says, “Who are Einstein and Picasso?”
Saint Peter sighs and says, “Come on in, George.”